I was so thrilled with the squirrels. Really I was. I spend a lot of time in our house overlooking the backyard, and they were a treat to watch. So even when the stole the one plum from our little plum tree, I was okay. I don’t care for plums that much anyway. And when they started snatching a yellow tomato here and there, I was okay with that too. We have had a constant line of yellow tomatoes on our counter since May. We can share. And then a green tomato too, which I was *mostly* okay with. Share and share alike, right? And then I found the largest watermelon, scratched up and abandoned near their hole. And I was not really okay with that, not at all. Because we have tried to grow melons for ages, and very few have looked as promising as this one. I chased them back under the shed and kicked the wood above their whole for good measure. As if squirrels care about that sort of thing. But okay, maybe if I put out another squirrel log, so they have something else to eat. But then I realized: it was all the watermelons. And the cantaloupes. And the honeydews. All. Of. Them. And I cried a little, because I had lost all my melons, and because I was googling “how to get rid of squirrels.” We will trap them, humanely, and release them in the park up the street where they can be with all the other squirrels. We all knew this was going to happen, right? Deep down, probably even me. But that doesn’t make it any less of a grand loss.